This was absolutely beautifully written. As a big sister I can relate to every feeling you felt as the little sister. The complex idea of the “good kid/bad kid”, the need to be perfect and cause less stress on my mom because my little sister was always in something. The fear of failing, making mistakes, being imperfect or simply living and experiencing life unapologetically. I didn’t lose my sister but those feelings I can resonate with. Thank you for being strong enough and in a place to share this with others!
aww Diamond, thank you so much for sharing this!! isn’t it such a strange relationship and role to have? with such long lasting effects. unasked (outright) yet so easily assumed from such a young age.
Thank you for sharing your grief with us. All of us grieve something or someone. Speaking about the people we’ve lost keeps them alive. Thanks for introducing me and the rest of substack to your brother.
oh thank you ms. dawn! it really means a lot that you read all of my essays. idk how you find the time to do it, but i always appreciate that you take the time out to do it and send me encouragement! can’t wait to see you sometime soon.
Well written and relatable. Especially the part where you think about the moments that never were ever able to be had. I lost my big sis when I was a junior in high school, almost 17 years ago, and I often think about the moments we never got to share or celebrate together. The graduations, the birthdays, the holidays, etc. Continue being strong and using this space as a safe space!
🖤🖤🖤
This was absolutely beautifully written. As a big sister I can relate to every feeling you felt as the little sister. The complex idea of the “good kid/bad kid”, the need to be perfect and cause less stress on my mom because my little sister was always in something. The fear of failing, making mistakes, being imperfect or simply living and experiencing life unapologetically. I didn’t lose my sister but those feelings I can resonate with. Thank you for being strong enough and in a place to share this with others!
aww Diamond, thank you so much for sharing this!! isn’t it such a strange relationship and role to have? with such long lasting effects. unasked (outright) yet so easily assumed from such a young age.
thank you for seeing me. and i see you!
Thank you for sharing your grief with us. All of us grieve something or someone. Speaking about the people we’ve lost keeps them alive. Thanks for introducing me and the rest of substack to your brother.
Thank you for saying that Christina! I know how busy you are, so thank you for squeezing my writing into the mix! :)
I never met Cody in person, but through your stories and memories, he feels so present. Thank you for sharing him with us.
thank you love. i appreciate that you let me remember with you.
You beautiful spirit, you. Thank you for sharing your grief and love in this tribute to Cody.
oh thank you ms. dawn! it really means a lot that you read all of my essays. idk how you find the time to do it, but i always appreciate that you take the time out to do it and send me encouragement! can’t wait to see you sometime soon.
Well written and relatable. Especially the part where you think about the moments that never were ever able to be had. I lost my big sis when I was a junior in high school, almost 17 years ago, and I often think about the moments we never got to share or celebrate together. The graduations, the birthdays, the holidays, etc. Continue being strong and using this space as a safe space!
What a lovely tribute. I’m glad I can get to know your brother through what you choose to share 🫶🏽